After the induction I finally felt what a real contraction was like. The problem was I had no build up. I went straight from slightly uncomfortable to 'HOLY SHIT get this baby OUT' in a matter of about 10 minutes. I'm sure that contractions are pretty horrible no matter what but without a chance to even get used to the idea they were unbearable. I've always had a huge tolerance for pain, (I'm the type to super glue cuts closed) but those contractions knocked the wind out of me. Mind you, I had never even had real period cramps before so this was a totally alien feeling to me and I couldn't handle it.
So I gave up...
I got the epidural.
And you know what? I have absolutely no regrets about it. After 36 hours of no progress I was dilated and ready to push within a half an hour of being induced and my little bean was ready to go! I pushed exactly four times and she came flying out to meet the world! Right as they gave her to me the Christmas tree in Rockefeller center was lit! I looked down at this perfect little baby lying on my chest and she looked back at me like she'd been dreaming of that moment for as long as I had. She squeezed my finger and stared at me memorizing my face until the nurse took her to get weighed and measured.
Aurora slept most of the night by my side in her little cot while I stared at her wondering how I could've made something so perfect. When she woke I would snuggle with her and try to breastfeed but she didn't seem very interested and then we noticed she was having a little trouble breathing. She wasn't getting air through her nose so she kept pursing her lips and exhaling through them making little phhft noises. It's impossible to describe. If it wasn't so scary, I'd say it was the most adorable thing I'd ever seen. The nurses kept coming to try to suction her nose and they took xrays to make sure her lungs and sinuses were okay. She never got to latch because she couldn't breathe through her nose. I pumped and we gave her the little I could get but she was jaundice and getting worse so once a full day but had passed without her getting a substansial feeding they gave her formula in the nursery. It's the only complaint I have about the whole hospital experience really. I suppose I understand why they did it but you'd think they would've let me be the one to give it to her! They were still pretty concerned about her jaundice so they had to put her under the bilirubin lights for awhile.
|Aura's little blue 'tanning booth'.|
The next day we were given the all clear and we headed home to begin our little love story...
|Yeah, this suit in NO way fit yet. But it was freezing.|